


A Captain, a Doctor, and a Pirate Walk into a Bar

by starsinger



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-06
Updated: 2017-06-06
Packaged: 2018-11-09 16:49:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11108742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starsinger/pseuds/starsinger
Summary: Let the jokes begin. Star Trek/Star Wars crossover. Don’t own them.





	A Captain, a Doctor, and a Pirate Walk into a Bar

Jim paused at the door to look in. “Who recommended this backwater planet and **this**?” he asked his companion.

“Crew needed a break, and Spock said it was inhabited,” Bones muttered. “He forgot to mention something important.”

Jim sighed. Yes, the Vulcan had failed to mention that he would feel right at home here. It WAS a desert planet after all. Tatooine was as dry and dusty as anything Jim had seen in a long time. And he’d seen a lot. “Well, we’re here long enough to quench our thirst and turn around,” Jim told him. “We’re skirting the edges of Imperial territory as it is.” Bones nodded. While Imperial Star Destroyers couldn’t penetrate the shields of the Enterprise, if a fleet showed up they’d definitely be in trouble. And the Emperor didn’t like Federation Starships. He was just glad that the inside of this bar, let’s face it, it was really a Cantina, was cool.

The two men approached the bar and became immediately grateful for the universal translators in their ears. They ordered their drinks and looked dubiously at the bright blue concoctions that landed in front of them. Jim sighed as he scooped up his drink and took a sip. It wasn’t bad. “Hey, Jim, look at that,” Bones murmured.

Jim’s draw dropped as one of the most beautiful specimens of the human species walked in followed by a large shaggy alien. Wookie, Jim mentally corrected himself, definitely a Wookie. His companion growled at him as they approached the bar. “Hi,” he said to Jim.

“Hi,” Jim responded. He sounded lame, even to himself.

“Hey,” the man said to the Wookie who growled at him again. “I know the Federation would be trouble. They won’t bother us. They’re not the Imps.” He smiled at Jim and Bones, “I’m Han Solo, my friend here is Chewbacca. You on that ship up there?”

“Yeah, we wandered this way. I’m Jim Kirk, Leo McCoy,” Jim responded.

“Welcome to the backside of nowhere,” Han said. He grinned mischievously at the pair. “I’m waiting for someone. You two together?” he asked.

Jim blushed, “You might say that.” Chewie growled at them amiably. Jim started to say something before the room grew silent. Everyone turned to look as the most beautiful woman Jim had ever seen walked in. Not only was she beautiful but she carried herself with power, self-assurance, and a sense of self-worth that few others even began to approach. Chewie growled at her and she smiled transforming her face into a luminousness unparalleled by anything Jim had seen before. She walked over to kiss Han. Chewie laughed as Jim’s eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets.

“Any news?” Han asked.

“Yeah, we need to be at the rendezvous point. Why did we need to stop in Mos Eisley?” she asked tartly.

“Darlin’, I spent months in carbonite. I think I deserve a drink,” Han told her. Jim suppressed a laugh as she glared at him. Han winced, “Alright, let me finish my drink.” He downed it one gulp before paying the bartender. He rose and wound his arm around the woman. “Leia, what would I do without you?” he asked as they passed out of the establishment.

“Get yourself killed, probably,” she responded absently, never glancing back.

Jim and Bones looked at each other before returning to their drinks. “Rendezvous, huh? Sounds like they’re planning something big,” Bones said.

“Do you know who that was?” Jim asked in a low voice. Bones shook his head. “That was Princess Leia Organa, one of the most powerful leaders in the Rebel Alliance, and now I can see why.” Bones nodded. This was an encounter neither of them would ever forget.


End file.
